I’m stealing the phrasing of the suggestion exactly as lovelikeheaven put it in the poll, since I like it.

( Some ideas )

In the royal sense, not the legal one.

( Since I keep finding myself drawn back to them )

I have such a weakness for good courts. Both my favorite authors, Guy Gavriel Kay and George R. R. Martin, regularly include them. But the shallow, simplistic, irritating ones are rather easier to write, and so they're the ones that get written more often.

Right. So. The peasant rant.

( Those cultured, intelligent, open-minded, hippie peasants? Imported from the author’s brain, methinks )

I’ve heard people complain that, if someone paid attention to all these aspects of writing medieval fantasy, the story would be too hard to write.

1) Bullshit. There are authors who manage it, especially Martin.
2) Why do you want to skimp on the details and write the next silly singing peasant girl going off with her troupe of performing monkeys party members? That’s stepping deliberately into one of the most stereotypical storylines.
3) Why do you want to write medieval fantasy if you’re going to ignore the complications? Medieval fantasy isn’t the end-all and be-all of the genre, but I do think if you’re going to write it, it should be because you love the period, not because you’re in love with a shallow version of it.

Also, the next rant shall be on ways to step out of writing medieval fantasy. So if you have a problem with 3, you could wait until then.

Just on royals, this time. Thanks to melarin for the idea.

( You might be medieval, but there’s no need to be pseudo-medieval )

Perhaps peasants shall be next.

Inspired by too much reading of grand court scenes, and mutters to myself of, "How would that work?"

( If you're going to stand on ceremony, make sure the footing is firm )

Might do something on hunting tomorrow. Too many fantasy heroes are perfect masters of the hunt the first time around.

I have a book called Very Bad Poetry. It's one of the most hilarious things in existence. And Fred Emerson Brooks, one of the worst poets ever to walk the earth, is in there.

Sampling:

From a patriotic poem:

Fear not, grand eagle
The bay of the beagle!

From a baby talk poem:

There ain't much edutation
In such a 'little head;
Besides, I is so s'eepy
And wants to do to bed...

Something's seeping around here, all right.

( Castles! )

Just a sampling of some of the problems. May do more tomorrow.

Given the subject matter of the rant today, I think a few lines from Swinburne’s “Tristram of Lyonesse,” a long Arthurian poem, are appropriate.

...and up forthright upon his steed
Leapt, as one blithe of battle, Palamede,
And mightily with shock of horse and man
They lashed together: and fair that fight began
As fair came up that sunrise: to and fro,
With knees nigh staggered and stout heads bent low
From each quick shock of spears on either side,
Reeled the strong steeds heavily, haggard-eyed
And heartened high with passion of their pride
As sheer the stout spears shocked again, and flew
Sharp-splintering: then, his sword as each knight drew,
They flashed and foined full royally, so long
That but to see so fair a strife and strong
A man might well have given out of his life
One year's void space forlorn of love or strife.

( Some ideas for setting up a medieval society )

I probably didn’t get everything, but I think I targeted most of what bugs the shit out of me in medieval fantasies.